The Absurdity of Modern Politics

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Celebrity Bobbleheads

In Uncategorized on September 12, 2008 at 12:18 pm
Carlos "Chuck" Norris With The Village People

Chuck Norris, second from right, with The Village People. Chuck was standing in for Biker/Leatherman for a recent Gaypalooza show in San Fransisco. Chuck closed the show by shooting the audience with baby oil from his powerful machine gun.

This is a letter to Carlos “Chuck” Norris, asking him to follow his party’s requests for celebrities to shut up and stick to acting/singing.  Of course, I think anybody who wants to exercise their free speech rights should do so.  I’m merely pointing out yet another example of the hypocrisy on the right, where it’s ok for them to roll out old Carlos, but celebrities with liberal views should shut up.

By the way, Carlos is Chuck Norris’ birth name, according to the ever accurate Wikipedia.

Dear Carlos,

I had the misfortune of seeing your interview with Larry King last night and noticed something peculiar, other than your ridiculous red beard and pseudo-mullet.  You appear to be the Rightists’ equivalent to the Leftists’ Rosie O’Donnell.  You both spew ignorant, incomprehensible, and pointless rhetoric; you’re both ill-equipped to give intelligent insight into modern politics; and you’re both ideological zealots.  Interestingly, the right constantly berates Hollywood celebrities for voicing their views, demanding that they stick to acting/singing and leave politics to those smart enough to string together a coherent message.

So, in case you haven’t received your party’s message, I’m requesting that you spare the public from your doltish babble and leave intelligent discourse to those fit to do so.  Please stop exposing yourself as an ignoramus and stick to what you do best: peddling cheap exercise equipment on late night television.  Washed up hack celebrities should rightfully be relegated to celebrity reality shows and infomercials.

As an independent minded voter, I’ll be voting for someone who truly puts The United States and The Constitution first, and doesn’t pander with divisive rhetoric and fake outrage.  So far, it’s not looking good for your guy and gal.

I hope ol’ Chuck doesn’t hunt me down and kick my guts out.  If so, I’ll sick Rosie on him.